Friday, December 2, 2011
No More Bagram - Only MeS
Monday, June 27, 2011
Buying at the Bazaars
What Make You Happy - at the Haji Marts
There are two basic types of Haji Marts on BAF: those sponsored by AAFES and those not sponsored by AAFES. In either case, you must be VERY careful when you buy from these hawkers.
There are two places for each type. AAFES has shops by ECP-1 and next to the main AAFES store. The other two are in the SF camps. There should be a sign at every entrance to the Haji shops that says, “CAVEAT EMPTOR”.
There are some bargains to be gained at “some” of these shops, but for the most part, you will pay too much for a piece that is WAY over valued/priced. Many of the gems are pressure and heat treated to make them a better stone. The vendor is supposed to tell you this up-front. Many of the lapis stones have been impregnated with dye to give them more blue color. (tip – use an alcohol prep pad to wipe on the stone; if there is blue on the pad, it is impregnated).
AAFES is supposed to have a money back guarantee for the products you purchase at the official AAFES shops. So, NEVER throw away your receipts. With the other SF shops, there are no guarantees, but the vendors will work with you if you are not satisfied.
Some of the vendors are just trying to make an honest living; but some will steal you blind and say anything to get you to buy something. As an example; those amber pieces with bits of leaves and bugs – FAKE, FAKE, FAKE. Did you notice that they all have the same shape? Those pillow cases and mini throw pieces that have all the “local” stones and metal thread that are “hand sewn by Afghani women in a remote village – that takes weeks to make” are mass produced in INDIA. Those old collector coins are FAKE. The 18K gold is sometimes 18K plated silver (found out when I took a piece to my jeweler in the US – that is why I tell you to keep the receipts).
The prices at the Haji shops are 10% to 50% more expensive than they are in other locations in Afghanistan. I’ve been to all the big bases and many of the FOB’s, PRT’s and FSB’s. You can thank AAFES for some of the cost increase; they charge the vendors a fee for using AAFES space.
Never, ever pay the first price quoted. Cut the price in half and start there. You will always hear, “What price make you happy”? Here are some tips that will help you:
-Research the product you want to buy. Get on the internet and print off the price and product. Almost always, the internet price is less than the Haji price.
-Take a friend who speaks the language (Dari, generally). This will always help.
-DO NOT impulse buy. It is not the last one he has, it is not a ”special deal just for you, my friend”.
-Do not pay for part of it now and he will bring the finished product to you next week. He may not be here next week or the base may shut down the haji mart for a long time (it was several months the last time).
-If you think you want to send your new purchase home, check with customs first. That fur or uncut stone may not be allowed in the US. Now, what are you going to do with that new fur coat?
-Three out of 10 pirated DVD’s don’t work.
-The DVD package says “the entire season”, but it probably does not have the entire season.
-Do not expect quality craftsmanship on handmade products; this way, you will not be disappointed.
-Learn something about the gems you want BEFORE you buy them. Afghan stones should be cheaper, because you are in Afghanistan, but that is not always the case.
-That certificate of authenticity from Kabul, you get with your gem, is not worth much (found out the hard way). Be very careful when you get the “certificate”.
There are two basic types of Haji Marts on BAF: those sponsored by AAFES and those not sponsored by AAFES. In either case, you must be VERY careful when you buy from these hawkers.
There are two places for each type. AAFES has shops by ECP-1 and next to the main AAFES store. The other two are in the SF camps. There should be a sign at every entrance to the Haji shops that says, “CAVEAT EMPTOR”.
There are some bargains to be gained at “some” of these shops, but for the most part, you will pay too much for a piece that is WAY over valued/priced. Many of the gems are pressure and heat treated to make them a better stone. The vendor is supposed to tell you this up-front. Many of the lapis stones have been impregnated with dye to give them more blue color. (tip – use an alcohol prep pad to wipe on the stone; if there is blue on the pad, it is impregnated).
AAFES is supposed to have a money back guarantee for the products you purchase at the official AAFES shops. So, NEVER throw away your receipts. With the other SF shops, there are no guarantees, but the vendors will work with you if you are not satisfied.
Some of the vendors are just trying to make an honest living; but some will steal you blind and say anything to get you to buy something. As an example; those amber pieces with bits of leaves and bugs – FAKE, FAKE, FAKE. Did you notice that they all have the same shape? Those pillow cases and mini throw pieces that have all the “local” stones and metal thread that are “hand sewn by Afghani women in a remote village – that takes weeks to make” are mass produced in INDIA. Those old collector coins are FAKE. The 18K gold is sometimes 18K plated silver (found out when I took a piece to my jeweler in the US – that is why I tell you to keep the receipts).
The prices at the Haji shops are 10% to 50% more expensive than they are in other locations in Afghanistan. I’ve been to all the big bases and many of the FOB’s, PRT’s and FSB’s. You can thank AAFES for some of the cost increase; they charge the vendors a fee for using AAFES space.
Never, ever pay the first price quoted. Cut the price in half and start there. You will always hear, “What price make you happy”? Here are some tips that will help you:
-Research the product you want to buy. Get on the internet and print off the price and product. Almost always, the internet price is less than the Haji price.
-Take a friend who speaks the language (Dari, generally). This will always help.
-DO NOT impulse buy. It is not the last one he has, it is not a ”special deal just for you, my friend”.
-Do not pay for part of it now and he will bring the finished product to you next week. He may not be here next week or the base may shut down the haji mart for a long time (it was several months the last time).
-If you think you want to send your new purchase home, check with customs first. That fur or uncut stone may not be allowed in the US. Now, what are you going to do with that new fur coat?
-Three out of 10 pirated DVD’s don’t work.
-The DVD package says “the entire season”, but it probably does not have the entire season.
-Do not expect quality craftsmanship on handmade products; this way, you will not be disappointed.
-Learn something about the gems you want BEFORE you buy them. Afghan stones should be cheaper, because you are in Afghanistan, but that is not always the case.
-That certificate of authenticity from Kabul, you get with your gem, is not worth much (found out the hard way). Be very careful when you get the “certificate”.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Overheard on the street
*******WARNING - STRONG LANGUAGE*******
A while back I was walking on Disney Drive and overheard the following conversation between two soldiers. They were talking about politicians coming to Bagram.
PFC: I hate it when these guys show up.
SPEC: I know what you mean. They f**k up everything when they get here.
PFC: Yeah, they want attention and the brass want to make sure they [the brass] look good. So, we get stuck hauling their a**es around and making sure they get what they want.
SPEC: I'm not sure who is better: the Democrats or the Republicans.
PFC: Yeah, the Democrats want a photo op. They shake your hand and get home to beer and steak. What a waste of my time for them to even show up. The Republicans want to visit the FOB's and PRT's. Now, I have to babysit the F**kers and make sure they don't get whacked.
SPEC: You got it man... what a waste of time.
I am not saying the soldiers are correct in their views: I am pointing out the view of the junior soldiers. They don't really care about the "brass" hob-nobbing with the politicos. They just want to do their job and go home at the end of their tour. They don't want to spend time watching out for politicians that are making a name for themselves and getting their face on the front page of the paper.
Next time you politicians think you are improving morale when you show up in Bagram, Kabul, Kandahar, or some of the FOB's/PRT's consider the extra effort these guys have to make just for your ego.
A while back I was walking on Disney Drive and overheard the following conversation between two soldiers. They were talking about politicians coming to Bagram.
PFC: I hate it when these guys show up.
SPEC: I know what you mean. They f**k up everything when they get here.
PFC: Yeah, they want attention and the brass want to make sure they [the brass] look good. So, we get stuck hauling their a**es around and making sure they get what they want.
SPEC: I'm not sure who is better: the Democrats or the Republicans.
PFC: Yeah, the Democrats want a photo op. They shake your hand and get home to beer and steak. What a waste of my time for them to even show up. The Republicans want to visit the FOB's and PRT's. Now, I have to babysit the F**kers and make sure they don't get whacked.
SPEC: You got it man... what a waste of time.
I am not saying the soldiers are correct in their views: I am pointing out the view of the junior soldiers. They don't really care about the "brass" hob-nobbing with the politicos. They just want to do their job and go home at the end of their tour. They don't want to spend time watching out for politicians that are making a name for themselves and getting their face on the front page of the paper.
Next time you politicians think you are improving morale when you show up in Bagram, Kabul, Kandahar, or some of the FOB's/PRT's consider the extra effort these guys have to make just for your ego.
Friday, November 19, 2010
Here are the stages of enthusiasm (as I see it) for new arrivals at BAF.
Prior to arriving: Uncertainty as to what to expect when they arrive – what are the living conditions; what type of work will I do; how dangerous is the base (how often do we get “hit” by the bad guys)?
First impressions upon arriving: Looking out the window of the plane – “People actually live in this barren waste land? It is all shades of brown: Where is the green? Did we just launch flares before landing? In-processing takes forever. My baggage is in that great heap of a mess outside in the dust? Thank God it is not raining or snowing”. [Epiphany – this is not fog. Fog does not burn my lungs and make my eyes itch. This is dust and smoke (from the open burn pit)].
Professionalism: Despite the “obstacles” of being on Bagram Air Field, I am going to do my job to the best of my ability. After all, I am US service member (or civilian) and I am here (was hired) to do a job. I will make a difference while I am here. I can make things better. I have some great ideas on process improvement.
Frustration, desperation, aggravation: It does not take long to discover the overwhelming regulations, rules, and in-fighting (between services/civilians/locals) that make your job almost impossible. There are so many O-5’s and above, the base is very top-heavy. If you are not in this category, you will have a difficult time. The base is duel-run: the Air Force controls the air field and the Army controls the rest. Everyone wants to protect their rice bowl and their piece of land. “How in the hell can I do my job under these conditions”? Most people understand this after two weeks.
Acceptance: Usually it takes between 6 weeks and 2 months to accept the status quo and realize that you will not have much of an impact on the “BAF WAY OF DOING THINGS”. At this point, most people are professional enough to do their jobs as best they can within the BAF process. “OK. I can do my job and I’ll eventually go home. When I leave, I can say that I did my work under adverse conditions.” I say most people because there are a few who never want to do their jobs under BAF conditions. I know one Major that had the following attitude after 2 weeks until he left at the end of his 6 month tour: “F**K it, I don’t care. I only have (XX number) weeks left here.” Or, another major had the attitude: “Things would have to improve before they suck.” Fortunately, they are the minority.
Vindication: Once acceptance has set in, most people go with the flow and do their job as best as they can. Some even try to find ways to work around, and within, some of the more egregious restrictions without compromising security or safety. They have discovered that they are not the “problem” and the “process” is the problem. So, they go about their work as best they can within the BAF system. Once the individual discovers the niche for his/her talents and abilities, the work goes much easier and they feel vindicated in their work ethic.
Prior to arriving: Uncertainty as to what to expect when they arrive – what are the living conditions; what type of work will I do; how dangerous is the base (how often do we get “hit” by the bad guys)?
First impressions upon arriving: Looking out the window of the plane – “People actually live in this barren waste land? It is all shades of brown: Where is the green? Did we just launch flares before landing? In-processing takes forever. My baggage is in that great heap of a mess outside in the dust? Thank God it is not raining or snowing”. [Epiphany – this is not fog. Fog does not burn my lungs and make my eyes itch. This is dust and smoke (from the open burn pit)].
Professionalism: Despite the “obstacles” of being on Bagram Air Field, I am going to do my job to the best of my ability. After all, I am US service member (or civilian) and I am here (was hired) to do a job. I will make a difference while I am here. I can make things better. I have some great ideas on process improvement.
Frustration, desperation, aggravation: It does not take long to discover the overwhelming regulations, rules, and in-fighting (between services/civilians/locals) that make your job almost impossible. There are so many O-5’s and above, the base is very top-heavy. If you are not in this category, you will have a difficult time. The base is duel-run: the Air Force controls the air field and the Army controls the rest. Everyone wants to protect their rice bowl and their piece of land. “How in the hell can I do my job under these conditions”? Most people understand this after two weeks.
Acceptance: Usually it takes between 6 weeks and 2 months to accept the status quo and realize that you will not have much of an impact on the “BAF WAY OF DOING THINGS”. At this point, most people are professional enough to do their jobs as best they can within the BAF process. “OK. I can do my job and I’ll eventually go home. When I leave, I can say that I did my work under adverse conditions.” I say most people because there are a few who never want to do their jobs under BAF conditions. I know one Major that had the following attitude after 2 weeks until he left at the end of his 6 month tour: “F**K it, I don’t care. I only have (XX number) weeks left here.” Or, another major had the attitude: “Things would have to improve before they suck.” Fortunately, they are the minority.
Vindication: Once acceptance has set in, most people go with the flow and do their job as best as they can. Some even try to find ways to work around, and within, some of the more egregious restrictions without compromising security or safety. They have discovered that they are not the “problem” and the “process” is the problem. So, they go about their work as best they can within the BAF system. Once the individual discovers the niche for his/her talents and abilities, the work goes much easier and they feel vindicated in their work ethic.
More logic incongruity –or, am I just expecting too much
I can understand the need for controlling the speed of traffic. On Bagram, the speed limit is a break-neck-speed of 25km/hr. I can even understand the need for safety belts; it is proven to save lives.
Here on BAF, if you go 9km/h over the speed limit, you will have your vehicle confiscated. Yep, no due process, no second chance – you have been warned. If you drive without a safety belt, you will have your vehicle confiscated. Now, if you start your vehicle without first strapping on your safety belt, you will have your vehicle confiscated. If you get caught without a license or you drive under the influence (I can understand this one, but there is not supposed to be any alcohol on base and you are not allowed to have narcotics on base – prescription or otherwise) you will be parking your vehicle with all the others in the compound at the north end.
I tell you all this to share the following:
I have seen Afghani’s stuffed into cars and jammed into the back of trucks. I have even seen them riding in the bucket of a frontend loader. No seat belt used.
I have seen MRAP’s driven like they were stolen (well over the speed limit) and I have never seen an MRAP in the compound.
Does this mean the rules are subjective? Just asking.
One more logic problem:
I have noticed that things are often done out of order. As an example, road construction. Numerous times I have seen a road being resurfaced (it can take 3 months to do 1 km). The surface looks good for about a week, then certain things happen. The first thing you notice is the road is pitting and eroding away in big chunks. Yep, now they send out the Quality Control guy to test the road… too late. The second thing you notice is the big ditch/channel dug across the road to accommodate a cable crossing or drainage ditch. Why didn’t someone put in the ditch/channel before the final surfacing? It took three months to do the road, surely someone had the forethought to put in the ditch early.
While I am asking stupid questions… can anyone tell me why we have condoms and pregnancy test kits in the PX if no one on BAF is supposed to be having sex? General Order Number 1 – NO SEX while on BAF.
At least the PX moved the Lamisil away from the Vagisil . You really don’t want to confuse those two products.
Here on BAF, if you go 9km/h over the speed limit, you will have your vehicle confiscated. Yep, no due process, no second chance – you have been warned. If you drive without a safety belt, you will have your vehicle confiscated. Now, if you start your vehicle without first strapping on your safety belt, you will have your vehicle confiscated. If you get caught without a license or you drive under the influence (I can understand this one, but there is not supposed to be any alcohol on base and you are not allowed to have narcotics on base – prescription or otherwise) you will be parking your vehicle with all the others in the compound at the north end.
I tell you all this to share the following:
I have seen Afghani’s stuffed into cars and jammed into the back of trucks. I have even seen them riding in the bucket of a frontend loader. No seat belt used.
I have seen MRAP’s driven like they were stolen (well over the speed limit) and I have never seen an MRAP in the compound.
Does this mean the rules are subjective? Just asking.
One more logic problem:
I have noticed that things are often done out of order. As an example, road construction. Numerous times I have seen a road being resurfaced (it can take 3 months to do 1 km). The surface looks good for about a week, then certain things happen. The first thing you notice is the road is pitting and eroding away in big chunks. Yep, now they send out the Quality Control guy to test the road… too late. The second thing you notice is the big ditch/channel dug across the road to accommodate a cable crossing or drainage ditch. Why didn’t someone put in the ditch/channel before the final surfacing? It took three months to do the road, surely someone had the forethought to put in the ditch early.
While I am asking stupid questions… can anyone tell me why we have condoms and pregnancy test kits in the PX if no one on BAF is supposed to be having sex? General Order Number 1 – NO SEX while on BAF.
At least the PX moved the Lamisil away from the Vagisil . You really don’t want to confuse those two products.
Friday, October 1, 2010
Logic in Bagram
I am going into my 4th year in Afghanistan (37 months to be precise) and one of the things I have learned (the hard way) is to turn off my logic circuits. Logic will only get you into trouble. Stop trying to think like you are still in the United States, Great Briton, Canada, or any European country.
When you land at Bagram Air Field, throw logic out the window. What you believe, what you have been taught, and what you know is a logical way of doing things, is not necessarily the way things will work here. Please... save yourself some trouble, heartache, and disappointment - STOP THINKING LOGICALLY.
I witnessed another example of missing-logic and the consequences of trying to force logic on someone who does not have a clue.
Little-miss-chippy - who has never been to Bagram, never met anyone at Bagram, never talked to anyone at Bagram - wrote a policy for a process involving people and material movement. When the local manager tried to stand up to little- miss-chippy (the bosses girlfriend) - the manager found another occupation that very same day.
Logic would dictate (and so would common sense) that someone familiar with the system should have input (if not outright carte blanche) for what is contained in the process... but NOOOO! We can't start a trend with logic.
My god... the earth's polar caps would melt, the moon would turn to blood, and the seas would boil if we start using logic.
This is just the most recent (that I know of) event in a long string of daily-illogical moments.
So, to you my friend - FMF - LONG MAY YOUR LUM REEK!!!!
When you land at Bagram Air Field, throw logic out the window. What you believe, what you have been taught, and what you know is a logical way of doing things, is not necessarily the way things will work here. Please... save yourself some trouble, heartache, and disappointment - STOP THINKING LOGICALLY.
I witnessed another example of missing-logic and the consequences of trying to force logic on someone who does not have a clue.
Little-miss-chippy - who has never been to Bagram, never met anyone at Bagram, never talked to anyone at Bagram - wrote a policy for a process involving people and material movement. When the local manager tried to stand up to little- miss-chippy (the bosses girlfriend) - the manager found another occupation that very same day.
Logic would dictate (and so would common sense) that someone familiar with the system should have input (if not outright carte blanche) for what is contained in the process... but NOOOO! We can't start a trend with logic.
My god... the earth's polar caps would melt, the moon would turn to blood, and the seas would boil if we start using logic.
This is just the most recent (that I know of) event in a long string of daily-illogical moments.
So, to you my friend - FMF - LONG MAY YOUR LUM REEK!!!!
Friday, September 3, 2010
Send The Civilians Home
The other day I overheard an Air Force Staff Sergeant tell a civilian the following:
SS: “I wrote to my congressman and told him that all the civilians should be sent home. You guys get paid too much”.
Civ: “I’m here because I want to be here. I like my job. You can apply for a civilian job when you get back”.
SS: “I like my family too much to do that to them”.
That exchange got me to thinking… what would happen if all the civilians were sent home? How would the dynamics change at Bagram? How would that affect the military in the long run or the short run?
Most of the civilians live in B-huts, Relocatable Buildings (RLB’s), or tents. Some civilians live in connex containers and a very few of them live in block barracks. The civilians living in block barracks generally work for the Air Force.
Most of the military live in tents (really big tents) or B-huts. Some of the military live in RLB’s or block barracks. The majority of the military in RLB’s or block barracks are Air Force.
So, living conditions for the military and civilians are on par (except if you are Army , Marine, or Navy).
Civilians are generally here longer and provide continuity when the military leave BAF (I arrived here 28 August 2007). Not all civilians have health coverage on BAF and must leave for simple things like a tooth filling.
Most of the time, civilian pay is based on US laws and computations. We do not generally get to negotiate our salaries (although, some of us have that luxury).
Most of us have families and the reason we are here are varied. Again, for the most part, we are here to make money to support our families. I know a 63 year old man that drives trucks outside the wire. He is here to send his grand kids through college. A few husband & wife teams are here to: pay for their house, pay down their bills, pay off credit cards, save money for their kids educations, or just for the pleasure of serving their country in a different fashion. I know a woman who is here just for the experiences to put on her resume (another "ticket punch") - in the hopes of getting her dream job when she leaves.
So, there are many jobs to be done by civilians. Some of those jobs done by civilians include, but are not limited to:
Cleaning toilets, removing sewage from the Port-o-potties, collecting and disposing of gray water, burning the garbage, picking up garbage and trash, sweeping the runway and keeping it clean of snow/FOD, food preparation, kitchen duty, mail handling, mail delivery to the FOB’s and PRT’s and other bases, passenger terminal control, construction, mass transportation, ID card issue at ECP1, water distribution, water treatment, power production, power distribution, some aircraft maintenance, de-mining, road construction, overhead photography, maintenance on all mechanical equipment (air handlers, generators, heaters, lights, pumps, buildings and facilities), providing escorts for Afghan nationals in non-secure areas - they can arrive at ECP1 at 0300 and go home at 2330(by SOFA with Afghanistan, BAF is required to hire a certain number of locals), laundry services, fuel station services, PX/AAFES services, Greenbean Coffee services, fire fighting, intel gathering and analysis, hazardous material handling, cargo receiving and distribution, maintenance and construction at the FOB’s and PRT’s, vehicle repair and maintenance, contracting, master planning, engineering services, supplemental Force Protection, maintaining bulk fuel supply, personal internet and satellite entertainment channels provided by IO Global, barber shop and beauty salon, MWR services, long distance education services, pest control (vector), IT services, et al… YOU GET THE POINT?
My conclusion: if the civilians leave Bagram and the military are required to take the slack for all of the services provided by civilians, there will be longer deployments and more frequent deployments. I can envision 18 months of unaccompanied tours every three years. Those nasty jobs will be just like the good old days of my early Navy career: sweep, swab, make the coffee, take out the trash, clean the toilets, and then stand my duty. Speaking of Navy, I know a couple of Ship Servicemen that would love to practice their hair cutting skills on 30,000 captive service members...
(Note: see my comment about being a civilian in a military world in my first short story in this blog)
Keep your eyes open, your ears sharp, and your head on a swivel.
SS: “I wrote to my congressman and told him that all the civilians should be sent home. You guys get paid too much”.
Civ: “I’m here because I want to be here. I like my job. You can apply for a civilian job when you get back”.
SS: “I like my family too much to do that to them”.
That exchange got me to thinking… what would happen if all the civilians were sent home? How would the dynamics change at Bagram? How would that affect the military in the long run or the short run?
Most of the civilians live in B-huts, Relocatable Buildings (RLB’s), or tents. Some civilians live in connex containers and a very few of them live in block barracks. The civilians living in block barracks generally work for the Air Force.
Most of the military live in tents (really big tents) or B-huts. Some of the military live in RLB’s or block barracks. The majority of the military in RLB’s or block barracks are Air Force.
So, living conditions for the military and civilians are on par (except if you are Army , Marine, or Navy).
Civilians are generally here longer and provide continuity when the military leave BAF (I arrived here 28 August 2007). Not all civilians have health coverage on BAF and must leave for simple things like a tooth filling.
Most of the time, civilian pay is based on US laws and computations. We do not generally get to negotiate our salaries (although, some of us have that luxury).
Most of us have families and the reason we are here are varied. Again, for the most part, we are here to make money to support our families. I know a 63 year old man that drives trucks outside the wire. He is here to send his grand kids through college. A few husband & wife teams are here to: pay for their house, pay down their bills, pay off credit cards, save money for their kids educations, or just for the pleasure of serving their country in a different fashion. I know a woman who is here just for the experiences to put on her resume (another "ticket punch") - in the hopes of getting her dream job when she leaves.
So, there are many jobs to be done by civilians. Some of those jobs done by civilians include, but are not limited to:
Cleaning toilets, removing sewage from the Port-o-potties, collecting and disposing of gray water, burning the garbage, picking up garbage and trash, sweeping the runway and keeping it clean of snow/FOD, food preparation, kitchen duty, mail handling, mail delivery to the FOB’s and PRT’s and other bases, passenger terminal control, construction, mass transportation, ID card issue at ECP1, water distribution, water treatment, power production, power distribution, some aircraft maintenance, de-mining, road construction, overhead photography, maintenance on all mechanical equipment (air handlers, generators, heaters, lights, pumps, buildings and facilities), providing escorts for Afghan nationals in non-secure areas - they can arrive at ECP1 at 0300 and go home at 2330(by SOFA with Afghanistan, BAF is required to hire a certain number of locals), laundry services, fuel station services, PX/AAFES services, Greenbean Coffee services, fire fighting, intel gathering and analysis, hazardous material handling, cargo receiving and distribution, maintenance and construction at the FOB’s and PRT’s, vehicle repair and maintenance, contracting, master planning, engineering services, supplemental Force Protection, maintaining bulk fuel supply, personal internet and satellite entertainment channels provided by IO Global, barber shop and beauty salon, MWR services, long distance education services, pest control (vector), IT services, et al… YOU GET THE POINT?
My conclusion: if the civilians leave Bagram and the military are required to take the slack for all of the services provided by civilians, there will be longer deployments and more frequent deployments. I can envision 18 months of unaccompanied tours every three years. Those nasty jobs will be just like the good old days of my early Navy career: sweep, swab, make the coffee, take out the trash, clean the toilets, and then stand my duty. Speaking of Navy, I know a couple of Ship Servicemen that would love to practice their hair cutting skills on 30,000 captive service members...
(Note: see my comment about being a civilian in a military world in my first short story in this blog)
Keep your eyes open, your ears sharp, and your head on a swivel.
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Uniquely Bagram
I have lived and worked overseas for most of my life. I grew up in the Bahamas and have lived in numerous countries. My tour in Afghanistan started in August 2007. I have seen much of the country; been to every major base; seen dozens of PRT’s and FOB’s; but, Bagram is the most unique of all locations.
Japan, Italy, Australia, Germany, Spain, Mexico, Canada, Scotland, Wales, England, Guam, United Arab Emirates, and dozens of other places I have lived or visited have one thing in common: a civilized society that is acceptable to most and accepted by most. But, being in Bagram Air Field (BAF) presents a new set of challenges that make it the most unique place I have ever visited. Not everyone has the same view of "Civilized".
BAF is a conglomeration of cultures, people, and geopolitics. There are more than 28 nations represented on BAF and just as many languages can be heard at any given time. The US Air Force is responsible for a portion of the base and the US Army is responsible for the rest. Sometimes this presents a problem with getting things done in an orderly/timely fashion.
When you have so many people working and living in such a small area, there are bound to be some misunderstandings and cultural differences (even among the US military). The rules and regulations for BAF are designed to enhance security and provide a basis for day-to-day operations. But, as with any rule/law/policy/procedure you cannot predict every contingency. Therefore, you must interpret the meaning of the regulation/policy/rule… et al for the benefit of good order and discipline.
Most of us know the adage, “Common sense is neither common nor sensible to other people”. Well, that is the way of Bagram. If you expect things to work as they do in the US, you are in for a rude awakening. "WE are not in Kansas anymore".
For example: getting material onto the base is a process that is worthy of Rube Goldberg. The construction standards on the base are generally to US standards. That means you must order much of the material from the US. Once the material leaves the US, it is sent to Pakistan (Karachi) for overland shipment. If the material makes it through customs, then it is shipped via truck to Afghanistan. If the material makes it through the border, then it is shipped to Kabul for customs inspections. If it makes it through customs, then it is sent to Bagram to be processed through Entry Control Point 3. If it makes it through ECP3, then you can collect your truck and escort it to a lay-down yard: if you have room in your lay-down yard (there is little room available on BAF for lay-down).
All shipments are predicated on nothing happening to your material on the way. The port in Karachi can hold your material if there is anything wrong with the invoice. There is a “tax” (corruption fee) to get the material through the port. Then, if you are lucky, the trip overland will be mishap free – hijacked or blown up. If you make it to the Afghan border, there is another “fee” to get your stuff in country. Again, if you make it to Kabul mishap free, you will have another customs agent to pay (another “fee”). If you can get your material through customs in Kabul, then you still have to travel to BAF overland… can you say “Taliban hijack”? Once your container arrives at BAF, it must wait outside ECP3 until the Afghan “truck lord” decides your truck can go through the gate. His decision is based on the amount of the “fee” you are willing to pay into his “retirement” fund. (I have had trucks wait 15 days to enter the base). If there is no force protection issues currently enforced (base lock-down) then you can get your material if it is in the line to enter the base. Hopefully, the seals are still in place on the truck and your material is not on the black market somewhere in Pakistan or Afghanistan. Even if the seals are in place, there is no guarantee that the material you ordered is actually in the truck. The “Customs Officials” may have knocked the pins out of the doors and taken the doors off completely.
This is just one example of how things are different in BAF. I have many more examples.
AS Scotty says: “Don’t let your head explode over things you cannot control”.
Japan, Italy, Australia, Germany, Spain, Mexico, Canada, Scotland, Wales, England, Guam, United Arab Emirates, and dozens of other places I have lived or visited have one thing in common: a civilized society that is acceptable to most and accepted by most. But, being in Bagram Air Field (BAF) presents a new set of challenges that make it the most unique place I have ever visited. Not everyone has the same view of "Civilized".
BAF is a conglomeration of cultures, people, and geopolitics. There are more than 28 nations represented on BAF and just as many languages can be heard at any given time. The US Air Force is responsible for a portion of the base and the US Army is responsible for the rest. Sometimes this presents a problem with getting things done in an orderly/timely fashion.
When you have so many people working and living in such a small area, there are bound to be some misunderstandings and cultural differences (even among the US military). The rules and regulations for BAF are designed to enhance security and provide a basis for day-to-day operations. But, as with any rule/law/policy/procedure you cannot predict every contingency. Therefore, you must interpret the meaning of the regulation/policy/rule… et al for the benefit of good order and discipline.
Most of us know the adage, “Common sense is neither common nor sensible to other people”. Well, that is the way of Bagram. If you expect things to work as they do in the US, you are in for a rude awakening. "WE are not in Kansas anymore".
For example: getting material onto the base is a process that is worthy of Rube Goldberg. The construction standards on the base are generally to US standards. That means you must order much of the material from the US. Once the material leaves the US, it is sent to Pakistan (Karachi) for overland shipment. If the material makes it through customs, then it is shipped via truck to Afghanistan. If the material makes it through the border, then it is shipped to Kabul for customs inspections. If it makes it through customs, then it is sent to Bagram to be processed through Entry Control Point 3. If it makes it through ECP3, then you can collect your truck and escort it to a lay-down yard: if you have room in your lay-down yard (there is little room available on BAF for lay-down).
All shipments are predicated on nothing happening to your material on the way. The port in Karachi can hold your material if there is anything wrong with the invoice. There is a “tax” (corruption fee) to get the material through the port. Then, if you are lucky, the trip overland will be mishap free – hijacked or blown up. If you make it to the Afghan border, there is another “fee” to get your stuff in country. Again, if you make it to Kabul mishap free, you will have another customs agent to pay (another “fee”). If you can get your material through customs in Kabul, then you still have to travel to BAF overland… can you say “Taliban hijack”? Once your container arrives at BAF, it must wait outside ECP3 until the Afghan “truck lord” decides your truck can go through the gate. His decision is based on the amount of the “fee” you are willing to pay into his “retirement” fund. (I have had trucks wait 15 days to enter the base). If there is no force protection issues currently enforced (base lock-down) then you can get your material if it is in the line to enter the base. Hopefully, the seals are still in place on the truck and your material is not on the black market somewhere in Pakistan or Afghanistan. Even if the seals are in place, there is no guarantee that the material you ordered is actually in the truck. The “Customs Officials” may have knocked the pins out of the doors and taken the doors off completely.
This is just one example of how things are different in BAF. I have many more examples.
AS Scotty says: “Don’t let your head explode over things you cannot control”.
Friday, May 21, 2010
A word about our troops.
This is a diversion from my normal happy-go-lucky post.
I am tired of seeing slanted reports in the news about how terrible our troops are: “Civilians killed by US troops”, “Collateral damage caused by US troops”, “Karzai wants restraint on US troops”, “MacCrystal apologizes for US troop’s mishaps and promises greater restraint on troops-in-contact”. What a crock of sh*t. What you don’t read is the behind the scene story. The collateral damage caused by US troops is because the Taliban use women and children as shields. They hide in mosques, clinics, and civilian homes. They fire on coalition troops from these locations. They hijack fuel tankers and leave them in villages in the hopes that US troops will attack their position – but the Taliban are long gone and the villagers are stealing the fuel when we arrive. (Remember that incident?).
You never hear about the Afghan National Army (ANA) or Afghan National Police (ANP) getting whacked out on dope and shooting American troops. It has happened. Karzai never apologizes to US families for that crap. You don’t hear about the ANP breaking down your door (if you live in town) and taking your computer, all your electronics, body armor and weapons. And then the local police don’t know anything about it.
You don’t hear about the Taliban taking the family of an ANA member hostage , an ANA member that is stationed with US troops. The ANA family members are killed if the ANA member does not shoot Americans… it has happened. Did you hear about that?
You don’t hear about the ANA running like scared children when they get into a gun battle with the Taliban. You don’t hear about the ANA and ANP taking bribes, kick-backs, and hush money.
You don’t hear about the corruption fee everyone has to pay if they want to get around in this country. Try getting something through the border and then through customs without paying every Muhammed, Achmed, and Halil along the way.
And we have not even touched on the amount of greed and theft that occurs here. You can go down- town Kabul and find hundreds of US products that were hijacked at the border. You don’t hear about that in the news either.
But, you will always hear about how it is the American’s fault that we are not doing enough to help these poor people. You will hear how it is our fault that the Taliban are such bad people – if we could just sit down and talk to them… to understand them… to open a dialog… another crock of sh*t.
And you never hear the US soldiers complain about their treatment from the locals. You don’t hear about the kids that are paid by the local cleric to throw rocks at our troops. You didn’t hear about the Air Force woman whose jaw was broken by one of these little angels.
It is a shame (and and a sham) that so many Americans don’t really know what goes on here. You only get the slant of the biased media.
Read “Lone Survivor” by Marcus Luttrell if you want to have some idea of what it is like in Afghanistan.
Start doing your own research on what really happens here. Stop listening to the talking heads on the morning and evening news… that isn’t news.
Yep! I’m fired up about the poor treatment of our troops.
Someone get me a soapbox – I have something to say!!!!!
I am tired of seeing slanted reports in the news about how terrible our troops are: “Civilians killed by US troops”, “Collateral damage caused by US troops”, “Karzai wants restraint on US troops”, “MacCrystal apologizes for US troop’s mishaps and promises greater restraint on troops-in-contact”. What a crock of sh*t. What you don’t read is the behind the scene story. The collateral damage caused by US troops is because the Taliban use women and children as shields. They hide in mosques, clinics, and civilian homes. They fire on coalition troops from these locations. They hijack fuel tankers and leave them in villages in the hopes that US troops will attack their position – but the Taliban are long gone and the villagers are stealing the fuel when we arrive. (Remember that incident?).
You never hear about the Afghan National Army (ANA) or Afghan National Police (ANP) getting whacked out on dope and shooting American troops. It has happened. Karzai never apologizes to US families for that crap. You don’t hear about the ANP breaking down your door (if you live in town) and taking your computer, all your electronics, body armor and weapons. And then the local police don’t know anything about it.
You don’t hear about the Taliban taking the family of an ANA member hostage , an ANA member that is stationed with US troops. The ANA family members are killed if the ANA member does not shoot Americans… it has happened. Did you hear about that?
You don’t hear about the ANA running like scared children when they get into a gun battle with the Taliban. You don’t hear about the ANA and ANP taking bribes, kick-backs, and hush money.
You don’t hear about the corruption fee everyone has to pay if they want to get around in this country. Try getting something through the border and then through customs without paying every Muhammed, Achmed, and Halil along the way.
And we have not even touched on the amount of greed and theft that occurs here. You can go down- town Kabul and find hundreds of US products that were hijacked at the border. You don’t hear about that in the news either.
But, you will always hear about how it is the American’s fault that we are not doing enough to help these poor people. You will hear how it is our fault that the Taliban are such bad people – if we could just sit down and talk to them… to understand them… to open a dialog… another crock of sh*t.
And you never hear the US soldiers complain about their treatment from the locals. You don’t hear about the kids that are paid by the local cleric to throw rocks at our troops. You didn’t hear about the Air Force woman whose jaw was broken by one of these little angels.
It is a shame (and and a sham) that so many Americans don’t really know what goes on here. You only get the slant of the biased media.
Read “Lone Survivor” by Marcus Luttrell if you want to have some idea of what it is like in Afghanistan.
Start doing your own research on what really happens here. Stop listening to the talking heads on the morning and evening news… that isn’t news.
Yep! I’m fired up about the poor treatment of our troops.
Someone get me a soapbox – I have something to say!!!!!
Monday, April 5, 2010
Driving On Bagram Air Field (BAF)
Traffic on BAF
OMG!!!! You think your traffic is bad at home (well, maybe it is)? You should try driving on-base here. What a nightmare. Cram 33,000 people in an area the size of a medium American airport. Now, give half the population a vehicle. Add in all of the military vehicles (US, Polish, French, German, Egyptian, UAE, et al) and then add the Afghani trucks bringing in goods and materials. Oh yes, the most important ingredient in this American Automobile Association worst location to drive (OK, it’s not really on the list, but should be): ONE ROAD that loops around the base.
Let’s dissect the interesting bits, shall we?
One road: called Disney Drive (not named after the famous Walt, but rather after Jason – a casualty of this war). Originally, this was a Russian base. The Russians don’t spend money on frivolous things like personal amenities for individuals, in this case, vehicles. You did not need a big road during the Russian occupation; no one had a vehicle for personal use. But, that little oversight has been rectified since the Americans have taken over the base. There are now more vehicles on BAF than there are in the entire surrounding Province (that is just a guess, but I believe it is accurate). There are no major arteries leading from the road, so you cannot take short-cuts (unless you cross the runway – and that is not allowed; can you say “Authorized use of deadly force”?).
The main road is exactly 14.5 kilometers to drive around the entire base (about 8.7 miles). When traffic is bad, it can take an hour or more to circumnavigate the base. Oh, yes... you can not drive on Disney between 0500 and 0730 because all the military members are supposed to be using the road for their physical training. I hope you don't have a plane to catch at the passenger terminal during those hours or you will have to walk with all your gear (or, try to catch the "one" bus that is supposed to be operating at that time of the day... right!!!!)
We call Disney a road in the broadest sense of the word. If this road existed in any city, county, or state in the US or any European country, it would be shut down for safety reasons: Pot holes, no shoulders, narrow lanes, no turnouts, right angle turns, (and in some areas: no asphalt), and the ever present egregious amounts of dust.
Vehicles of all descriptions: All those vehicles need fuel. The fuel comes into the base via Afghan tankers. They do not arrive in ones and twos: that is inefficient. They come in the gate in batches of 5 to 10 and are escorted to their destination. Again, I must stress that things are not the same here as in the US or Europe: the standards for Afghan vehicles are somewhat lacking - OK, mostly missing: “If you can drive it, it’s OK to take it on the street”. Big clouds of belching smoke spewing from the exhaust; suspension springs that have been broken since Noah was a mess cook on the Ark (can you tell I am retired Navy?); windshields that have more cracks than the San Andreas fault; and tires that have less tread than a billiard ball. Now, just imaging a string of 10 to 15 of these wonderful smoke emitting rattle-traps plowing through the stops signs on Disney (they have the right-of-way because they are in convoy). God help you if you are walking along the street when these behemoths pass by you. Now you know why I wear a scarf every day of the year (it also keeps the dust out of my lungs).
It is not just the fuel trucks that are in this dilapidated state: all of the local trucks are just as bad. There are trucks that deliver all manner of goods: construction material, consumable material, and things I don’t want to know about (“need to know basis”).
Now, let’s throw in all the various military vehicles. Have you ever heard of an MRAP? Check Wikipedia http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MRAP_%28armored_vehicle%29 There are lots of these on “THE” road. You should see what the Arabs have done to their MRAP’s. Their modifications made the footprint of the vehicles even bigger. The French have a cute little amphibian vehicle that putters around the base. There really isn’t much need for the “ducks” in this region of the world – high desert where the average annual rain fall is less than 12 inches.
There are other support vehicles on the road i.e., fire trucks, ambulance, flat beds, sea containers, cranes, dump trucks, concrete trucks, sewage trucks (my personal favorite: NOT!!!), and buses. Lots of buses. These buses are usually in one of two states: completely crammed packed with people or completely empty. There is a posted schedule for the shuttle bus that runs the circuit (remember it is just one road), but it is unreliable and NEVER on time. Thank God I have my own car (are you laughing yet?).
Speed limit: You can drive as fast as you want, as long as you do not go over 25kph. That would be approximately 15.6 miles per hour. Yep, breakneck speed. You can get a ticket for going over the speed limit by as much as 3 mph. If you are traveling too fast (let’s say about 25mph), they just take your vehicle and impound it in the north end of the base. You know, right next to the fence where all those wonderful little children gather to throw rocks at you. Your vehicle is now a target for these little angels. (Side note – a local religious leader is paying the children to throw rocks at anything that moves inside the base. Ask the Air Force woman, who had her jaw broken when one of these little blighters scored a direct hit, if that was an act of love/Godliness. Many vehicles have broken windows or big dents as a result of flying debris from the local hoodlums.)
I have even seen people on bicycles get tickets for “speeding”.
Weather conditions: Remember the aforementioned high desert? It is hot from April to October and it is dry. The dust in this area is baby-powder-fine. It gets into everything. When the wind blows (May through September) the dust is pervasive and overpowering at times. Sometimes, you cannot see the sun for all the dust in the air. Now, just imagine trying to drive in that mess and then add the belching exhaust from the traveling Afghan death traps with just a hint of the burning garbage from the north burn pit. Wonderful! I believe this is the description of the fourth ring of hell as mentioned in Dante’s Seven Rings of Hell.
We don’t often get rain. Rain makes everything muddy (OK, it does clean the air of dust – that is a good thing). The mud is all over the place because the dust is everywhere. That also means that the potholes and low points in the road are full of water and mud. I have actually submerged the front left quarter panel of my 4X4 in a “pothole” that was full of water.
So, you may be asking yourself, “Hearing all this bitching and moaning from me, why stay there”? The short answer: I love my work. I think I am making a difference in the quality of life for those people who have to be here every day. It gives me a sense of satisfaction to see my work appreciated by our service members.
And this blog is about the road on BAF... you should see what passes for roads outside the fence... OMG!!!
OMG!!!! You think your traffic is bad at home (well, maybe it is)? You should try driving on-base here. What a nightmare. Cram 33,000 people in an area the size of a medium American airport. Now, give half the population a vehicle. Add in all of the military vehicles (US, Polish, French, German, Egyptian, UAE, et al) and then add the Afghani trucks bringing in goods and materials. Oh yes, the most important ingredient in this American Automobile Association worst location to drive (OK, it’s not really on the list, but should be): ONE ROAD that loops around the base.
Let’s dissect the interesting bits, shall we?
One road: called Disney Drive (not named after the famous Walt, but rather after Jason – a casualty of this war). Originally, this was a Russian base. The Russians don’t spend money on frivolous things like personal amenities for individuals, in this case, vehicles. You did not need a big road during the Russian occupation; no one had a vehicle for personal use. But, that little oversight has been rectified since the Americans have taken over the base. There are now more vehicles on BAF than there are in the entire surrounding Province (that is just a guess, but I believe it is accurate). There are no major arteries leading from the road, so you cannot take short-cuts (unless you cross the runway – and that is not allowed; can you say “Authorized use of deadly force”?).
The main road is exactly 14.5 kilometers to drive around the entire base (about 8.7 miles). When traffic is bad, it can take an hour or more to circumnavigate the base. Oh, yes... you can not drive on Disney between 0500 and 0730 because all the military members are supposed to be using the road for their physical training. I hope you don't have a plane to catch at the passenger terminal during those hours or you will have to walk with all your gear (or, try to catch the "one" bus that is supposed to be operating at that time of the day... right!!!!)
We call Disney a road in the broadest sense of the word. If this road existed in any city, county, or state in the US or any European country, it would be shut down for safety reasons: Pot holes, no shoulders, narrow lanes, no turnouts, right angle turns, (and in some areas: no asphalt), and the ever present egregious amounts of dust.
Vehicles of all descriptions: All those vehicles need fuel. The fuel comes into the base via Afghan tankers. They do not arrive in ones and twos: that is inefficient. They come in the gate in batches of 5 to 10 and are escorted to their destination. Again, I must stress that things are not the same here as in the US or Europe: the standards for Afghan vehicles are somewhat lacking - OK, mostly missing: “If you can drive it, it’s OK to take it on the street”. Big clouds of belching smoke spewing from the exhaust; suspension springs that have been broken since Noah was a mess cook on the Ark (can you tell I am retired Navy?); windshields that have more cracks than the San Andreas fault; and tires that have less tread than a billiard ball. Now, just imaging a string of 10 to 15 of these wonderful smoke emitting rattle-traps plowing through the stops signs on Disney (they have the right-of-way because they are in convoy). God help you if you are walking along the street when these behemoths pass by you. Now you know why I wear a scarf every day of the year (it also keeps the dust out of my lungs).
It is not just the fuel trucks that are in this dilapidated state: all of the local trucks are just as bad. There are trucks that deliver all manner of goods: construction material, consumable material, and things I don’t want to know about (“need to know basis”).
Now, let’s throw in all the various military vehicles. Have you ever heard of an MRAP? Check Wikipedia http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MRAP_%28armored_vehicle%29 There are lots of these on “THE” road. You should see what the Arabs have done to their MRAP’s. Their modifications made the footprint of the vehicles even bigger. The French have a cute little amphibian vehicle that putters around the base. There really isn’t much need for the “ducks” in this region of the world – high desert where the average annual rain fall is less than 12 inches.
There are other support vehicles on the road i.e., fire trucks, ambulance, flat beds, sea containers, cranes, dump trucks, concrete trucks, sewage trucks (my personal favorite: NOT!!!), and buses. Lots of buses. These buses are usually in one of two states: completely crammed packed with people or completely empty. There is a posted schedule for the shuttle bus that runs the circuit (remember it is just one road), but it is unreliable and NEVER on time. Thank God I have my own car (are you laughing yet?).
Speed limit: You can drive as fast as you want, as long as you do not go over 25kph. That would be approximately 15.6 miles per hour. Yep, breakneck speed. You can get a ticket for going over the speed limit by as much as 3 mph. If you are traveling too fast (let’s say about 25mph), they just take your vehicle and impound it in the north end of the base. You know, right next to the fence where all those wonderful little children gather to throw rocks at you. Your vehicle is now a target for these little angels. (Side note – a local religious leader is paying the children to throw rocks at anything that moves inside the base. Ask the Air Force woman, who had her jaw broken when one of these little blighters scored a direct hit, if that was an act of love/Godliness. Many vehicles have broken windows or big dents as a result of flying debris from the local hoodlums.)
I have even seen people on bicycles get tickets for “speeding”.
Weather conditions: Remember the aforementioned high desert? It is hot from April to October and it is dry. The dust in this area is baby-powder-fine. It gets into everything. When the wind blows (May through September) the dust is pervasive and overpowering at times. Sometimes, you cannot see the sun for all the dust in the air. Now, just imagine trying to drive in that mess and then add the belching exhaust from the traveling Afghan death traps with just a hint of the burning garbage from the north burn pit. Wonderful! I believe this is the description of the fourth ring of hell as mentioned in Dante’s Seven Rings of Hell.
We don’t often get rain. Rain makes everything muddy (OK, it does clean the air of dust – that is a good thing). The mud is all over the place because the dust is everywhere. That also means that the potholes and low points in the road are full of water and mud. I have actually submerged the front left quarter panel of my 4X4 in a “pothole” that was full of water.
So, you may be asking yourself, “Hearing all this bitching and moaning from me, why stay there”? The short answer: I love my work. I think I am making a difference in the quality of life for those people who have to be here every day. It gives me a sense of satisfaction to see my work appreciated by our service members.
And this blog is about the road on BAF... you should see what passes for roads outside the fence... OMG!!!
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